very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
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