Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
I'm pretty sure that my eyebrow is going to be swollen from a sex injury tomorrow and possibly a black eye. If it forms that way it wiil be the second time. Different eyeball. Different decade.
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
Randomize
