So I'm playing pool in my cowboy boots and some guy came up looks at my boots and goes, "you should've got the boots with the fur"
Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
Randomize
