Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
Randomize
