I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
no. you can't hotbox the world.
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
Randomize
