____ banged a stripper...well technically she's now a hooker...
He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
You can bone my sister, but I will end our friendship if you write 'LOLERS' one more time at the end of your texts.
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
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