If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
she smelled like a LAN party
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
Randomize