people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
Passed out on her toilet. Dog licked my face to wake me. Awkward talk with her boyfriend, who hadn't been home last night. Not sure exactly what town I'm in, but I'm south. Will call for ride when I figure it out.
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
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