i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
drunk at some random house party. come get me. i thought i pulled my dick out to go piss... it was my left nut. im soaked.
8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
So how do you explain to your boss that Siri called him mid sex?
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
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