Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
Hey just to warn you theres a really fat guy passed out in front of our front door snoring. Don't touch him, he's in god's hands now.
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
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