the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
Everyone says I win the strip club
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
Randomize
