so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
Randomize
