I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
Most awkward thing ever just happened. I was reaching in my purse to get something and a condom fell out into the woman's lap next to me. At least she knows I'm safe.
So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
Randomize