You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
She said she wants to move in with me. Time to black out and act as if we never had this conversation.
How are you a firefighter? People actually trust you with their lives??
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
Randomize
