i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
Randomize
