oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
you can officially check off peeing off the 5th floor while shouting "I want to break the guinness world record for longest piss stream" off your college to do list.
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
You know you are high when you are so glad it wasn't your freshly buttered raisin bread that fell on your foot. It was your $400 Ipod
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
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