I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
I woke up and she had washed, dried, folded my clothes, cooked me breakfast, and had started cleaning my room
haha, you sure you didnt fuck your mom?
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
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