If i come over, it means nothing
peeing in bathroom at penn station and the homeless man next to me is combing his beard with a fork...god I love new york
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
When you text me tomorrow to remind me to mail your parking pass, also remind me to make sure i did NOT pack my vibrator for this family vacation
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Randomize
