dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
I just spent the last two hours on the phone with Emily trying to explain to her how to finger herself.
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
Randomize