In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
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