I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
Drunk puking in my bathtub has plugged it up for the third time this year. I hate these calls to my landlord.
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
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