Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
i would totally switch to progressive if they'd let me bang that girl in the commercial.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
Randomize
