i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
Chef at hibachi place learned it was my bday and sprayed 20 second count worth of saki in my mouth. Not sure it was the right image to share with my kids, but thought you'd be proud.
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
He keeps bees of course he's weird
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
He told me that he had never gotten a blow job. I sat there for a second, then thought "I MUST FIX THIS!" It was fucking fantastic.
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