glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
I was cleaning up my drunken mess and I found my ID in a cereal box
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
And as drunk as I was I was able to show my mom how to make text italicized in Microsoft word
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
Randomize
