I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
Getting food poisoning after eating at work was the cherry on top of my "Welcome back to real life" sundae.
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
Randomize
