just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
I like how I get messages from eharmony at the same time I'm looking for a new vibrator. It's like the powers that be are just trying to make my life ironic.
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
Randomize
