My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
I told my boyfriend my favorite food was strawberry poptarts, now my email inbox is getting spammed with nude pics of him with his dick in a poptart box..
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
I think i got beer on your cat.
Randomize
