question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
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