oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
Like every two minutes he would pull out and whipser "don't you do it, you bastard" while looking at his penis. His new name in my phone is 'penis whisperer'
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
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