Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
Randomize
