Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
Part of me was thinking I should go old school and get a chasity belt before the semester starts. Really lock that shit down. But then I thought, fuck that. I'm going to hit that campus like an f5 whorenado
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which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
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