Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
you turned your livingroom into a bong?
I think she just tried to waterboard me with her vagina.
a girl just told me i should have been born earlier in the alphabet
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
Just chased ups truck with a half wiped ass for you. You're making dinner tonight
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
Randomize
