so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
Nah. And this is true. It's like you were trained by sexual Jedi or something.
*jedi wave* this is the penis you were looking for
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey do you eat chocolate chip pancakes with bacon in?
DO NOT MAIL ME A PANCAKE
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
I wish the guy in the stall next to me would stop moaning while taking a dump.
I wish you'd stop texting me from the toilet.
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