No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
I just love that it's Veterans Day because I know in my heart that I have serviced some of their brethren in the dirtiest, hottest, most shameful ways possible.
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
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