is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
Randomize
