I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
I've been trying to fall asleep with ice packs covering my vagina for the last hour... Sorry for being vulgar. I'm going to kill myself.
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
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