coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
I'm dreading the fact that when the dominoes guy comes, he will ask me if i placed an order under the name "high as shit".
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
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i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
My drunken abilities have only improved since college....I can navigate the streets of chicago like no ones business, do push-ups to hail a taxi and instantly become an mma fighter after 3 shots of hennessy
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
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right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
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