Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
We smell like vodka and hangover
Randomize
