so the weed I found in my fridge is actually lettuce. tell jim I need that 5 bucks after all
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
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