she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
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