? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
Only my sister would update her facebook status while going into labor.
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
Like hey, "you just spent $135k to go to a nobody law school to drive a mini van, be a dj, live in a smalllll ass apartment that smells like cats and your girlfriend fucks other guys."
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
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