i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
I miss vodka workout Fridays
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
How the hell does my fucking boss know about the goddamned magician I fucked?!?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
Randomize