You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
I'm babysitting and we're watching Barney and I don't understand why Barney can magically make band hats appear but he makes them make shitty ass instruments.
Barney's a jerk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
he fucked my hip out of place.
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
Maybe they'll dismiss me from jury duty after they smell beer on me. You can't keep me in a cage and then give me an hour and a half long lunch break next to a beer fest and expect sobriety.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
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