i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
Randomize
