Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
bouncer thought i was tryin to get the license plate numbers of strippers to stalk them. I had to go show him where I threw up to get back in.
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
One of my friends took me out last night for a bday celebration and I just now remembered that a man blew fire balls across the bar in honor of my birthday... How drunk do you have to be to forget that?
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
He tried to throw up into a beer bottle. It was a complete disaster. Vomit went everywhere. It put the Bellagio's fountain to shame.
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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