I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
I looked into this "it's just lunch" matchmaker thing and it was like 5 grand. If I'm gonna spend five grand I'll throw in another three and get new tits and find my own fucking husband.
Randomize