i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
Randomize