Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
i have nine cents in my fucking bank account... not even a dime
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
Randomize
