Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
My life is like the prequel to "40 Year Old Virgin"
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
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