pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
Are we in a gay sports bar?
Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
So turns out my new assistant isn't really my assistant. The owner needed a title for his FWB so his wife wouldn't catch on. I got a three hundred a month credit limit boost on my corporate credit card instead.
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
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